Passion and Aim

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Bismillahirrahmanirrahim,


I am a girl, with an average passion, in everything she does.

I like sports, but it's not like something I follow up all the times. But I do enjoy them.
I like to read, but compared to before, I take more than 3 days to finish a book. Doesnt sound like a bookworm anymore.
I like to draw, but nothing drives me to draw.
I like musics, but I'm not good in composing songs.

I dont have an ambition to be in my life currently.
I follow the flow where my interest and my capabilities as the indicator of my future.

Okay, I dont like Maths. It's not like I hate them, I dont. I've been spending 12 years of my life, learning Maths, struggling in the subject. No-ope. Numbers not my thing. I tried anyway. Decided not to pursue anything related to Maths for my degree. So I crossed engineering and major maths, definitely, and courses that need me to take Maths. I'm not going to sleep in one of the classes anymore.

So far as a pure science student, I think Bio clicked me very well, although I might do not get excellent marks for it, but it dominantly showed that I can bear with it very well, including Chemistry.

Physics? Numbers? Capital N-O with exclamation mark. Twice.

Why I dont pursue medicine, knowing that I still can bear with the subject.

To be honest, Idk when, I think since Form 2, my study lifestyle has changed. Drastically. I dont push myself anymore. What I get, as long its passable, then I feel thankful for it. So, I dont really study much unless during examination.

Medicine is for hardcores. Or gifted. Or both.

I considered myself lucky.

I envy people with passion in whatever they do. It doesn matter in sports, or in debates, something they can give their full commitment in it, doing it without feeling bored, or tired. That's why people with passion attracts me in a way I couldnt describe. Probably to fill the empty inside of me which lack in passion. Haha.

But rn, I'm near to my own future. I'm going to write my own journey. Degree is something that unlike school, which has sort of ujian penggal pertama before the real exam comes. Degree is what you give, you will get what you give.

And I dont know how passion and aim related in here. Oh well.

My aim for my degree, of course, to put extravaganza effort for my pointer (hopefully. someone has to knock my head if I ever forgotten this)

As I dont really know what I am gonna be yet.

Or is it because I put my trust in Allah for my future?

No, I'm not gonna just sit back and relax.

I know what am I supposed to do.

Getting much experiences in anything as much as I can.

I think Ive started to be committed in it. Oh, and maybe I already found my passion.

Sometimes, writing does help to sort out my complicated way of thinkings.







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